I can be found at https://github.com/kimegitee

The capacity for love

After a painful exeperience with hope and let down, I figured there were some lessons to be learned.

First thing is not everyone has the capacity to love. And no, it doesn't make them in the wrong. It might be the case that it has been taken away from them, not by a single but a series of experiences. You don't know their pains and how deep it gets. And likely will never know.

The second thing is to look for it. Something appeals to people's tender side. Could be pets, could be other people's suffering. All good signs. If you are going to learn something about someone, then learn that. It's the most crucial thing of all. Can they love at all?

There is serenity in knowing what you feel about things. To put them in words. To see them clearly. To know what it's like. I found tremendous relief, just by working through my thoughts, one by one. By telling them with utmost honesty. Not a false thought in there. It is a great gift, to know what you think.

And then there's that warmth that comes from being useful. Something you did helped somebody, as simple as an incongruence you pointed out, that saved them from a misunderstanding. Or a thing you know very well, but seems to completely escape someone. Heck, I'm good am I not. That's why I'm here, that why this world needs me. It snapped you out of your own coma, back to a place where you feel like there's a reason to keep going.

Topics to learn

• Why expected sum is sum of expected even for dependent r.v's?
• Why markov chains converge to a stationary distribution?
• Why can probability be interpreted as an integration kernel, thus can be negative?
• How exactly do error correction codes work?